I am really beginning to hate this word.
Fresh with inspiration after finishing my purple tweed sweater, I dug out the blue yarn and pattern directions for Paloma, which was so challenging that two summers ago, I abandoned it to Ravelry's "hibernating" project category. A few weeks ago, I knit the first couple of rows, and got stuck on PRB, a lifted increase. After a few weeks, I found help with that hurdle, and knit some more rows. These rows don't line up. Back to the beginning.
Leaving that aside, I eagerly swatched for the Summer Flies shawl. Gauge is 4" = 12 stitches, for a DK or worsted yarn, on a size 8 needle. Huh??!! I went up to a size 11 needle, still with two stitches too many. I posted a question on Ravelry, and someone suggested this was the blocked gauge, though no one was sure if it was for stockinette or the eyelet pattern. I then read through all 41 pages of posts for the KAL last summer, and a number of knitters remarked that the shawl came out smaller than the pattern's suggested sizes, which I want to avoid. I emailed the designer, who was very friendly, and said that the gauge doesn't matter because of the blocking, but that still doesn't really help me...I'm going to go with 10s, which still seem too loose, and hope for the best.
But knitting is not the only area of my life right now where the theme of perseverance keeps recurring.
* I went to a meeting at a labor agency hoping for ideas for other companies or career paths that use my writing and editing skills. After looking over my resumes and cover letters, and being told by the agent there was nothing he would recommend I change, that he didn't have anything else to offer me, he ended by saying, "be persistent...it will come."
* I attended a workshop called "Design Your Dreams" for women entrepreneurs, to learn more about goal-setting and promoting business. The exercises were fun -- vision boards are similar to the magazine collages I loved to make in art class -- and the dreaded networking was not so bad. (I am an introverted person, and networking is a painful but necessary process I have resigned myself to embrace). The speakers' main message, advice for achieving goals and dreams? Perseverance.
On break, before we start collaging. Yes, I chose the pink paper.
* Two weeks ago, I bought a copy of Ride Your Way Lean by Selene Yeager. I needed a cycling training plan to help build strength and endurance (a cousin of the p-word) while also helping me to lose some weight. Week one was tough -- the rainy weather meant I spent many hours riding indoors on the stationary trainer which is mind-numbing, even with my Rosemary & Thyme DVDs. And week two? One workout in, and my hip/IT band is screaming in pain. Too many miles too fast. I'm doing ice and ibuprofen and trying not to get frustrated that I can't ride until the inflammation calms down. I feel like it's an uphill battle to get past this part of the training plan where the weak muscles will get stronger, to persevere until I can see results. Ack.
I am tired of persevering. I long for the "lucky break," the synchronicity where something positive will come together more easily and stick around for a while, to encourage me to keep persevering with all the other things for which I've been working so hard. Don't you feel that way sometimes too? I saw a sign in the labor agent's office that said something like, "So many people give up, not knowing that success was just around the corner." I sure hope I turn that corner soon!
P.S. I watched the Royal Wedding this morning, and thought Kate made such a lovely bride. I hope her simple, elegant style will have a great influence on fashion, as my favorite Grace Kelly's did so many years ago. I wish her and William the best for a long, happy marriage. With all the tragedy in the world lately, it was nice to share a little bit in their joy.
It was a beautiful dress, wasn't it? I think simple and elegant is always more beautiful than bling and pouf.
I'm sorry that you're feeling discouraged. I felt that way for a long time and then suddenly, the winds changed. I'm sure they'll change again, but I'll enjoy the fair winds while I can.
Posted by: Bubblesknits | April 29, 2011 at 10:51 PM
Argh! Every once in a while you just the stars to align and things to be easy. I'm hoping that time comes very soon for you. It sounds like you're doing some great new things right now -- I'm very impressed.
I knit that shawl and LOVED it. I used a heavy fingering weight yarn and size 5 (or maybe 6?) needles. It's the prettiest scarf I've made, and the size is very useful. Honestly, I'd just go with the fabric that you like (probably not size 10 needles) -- it's a round shawl with plenty of width and will be useable even if it's a little smaller. You know it will get even looser when you block it!
Posted by: jodi | April 30, 2011 at 11:34 AM
That knit is quit a journey!
I too want to shed a few pounds on my bike this summer. Maybe I should look into that book.
Kate was perfect. I LOVED her dress.
Posted by: Kara | April 30, 2011 at 12:14 PM
Ugh, sorry to hear about all the frustrating issues! At least with knitting, you can always start something new. I think the shawl will look great!
Posted by: Meredith | May 01, 2011 at 10:00 AM
I hope you will feel some sense of progress soon...the shawl is off to a great start!
Posted by: Sarah | May 02, 2011 at 08:27 AM
I wish you luck with the perseverance thing. Luck is big factor in what happens to people, be it good or bad. Sometimes you can help luck along.
You said you were seeking avenues for your writing/editing skills. Have you thought of doing something totally unrelated to writing/editing? You might end up finding something new you can do. For example, a friend of mine once said that if she laid off from her tech job, she would apply for a sales job at Crate and Barrel because she loves home decor and style things and it would not bother her to work behind a retail counter. Another fellow I know got laid off years ago as an engineer and started selling real estate and ended up liking it a lot.
Posted by: betty | May 03, 2011 at 05:56 PM
I hope you get some very good news soon! How is your hip doing? I hope it's better -- it's so frustrating when those lingering injuries won't go away. I hope you have been able to ride as much as you want!
Posted by: Dorothy W. | May 05, 2011 at 07:41 PM