Live Your Best Life

At the grocery store last week, I saw the headline on the new issue of Oprah's magazine: Live Your Best Life. As I loaded groceries on the conveyor belt, I asked myself: "What is a "best life?" What is my "best life?"

The quick and obvious answers are: good health, good relationships, and good finances. We all work on those. But best life strikes me as so much more than that. It is, I think, about filling your soul.

Filling your soul can mean growing and practicing your faith, and that is on my list of New Year's Goals too. But I think it also means taking those hard looks at your life, in its quietest moments, and finding the dissonance. What do you want your life to look like, and what does it actually look like? What parts of your life make you unhappy, and how could they be better? Or even best?

I hope you don't mind my introspection (and I promise this will touch on knitting eventually!). In trying to create my list for 2009, this whole best life concept has been nagging at me, beyond the new job, beyond the need to paint our hallway, beyond whether or not I have the energy to consider training for a cycling century. In 2007, I put down "call the real estate agent" as a New Year's goal, because we were not living our best lives in a small old house that needed a lot of work on a busy street with no privacy. Had I not written down "call the real estate agent," I would not be writing this now in a larger house that is much easier to maintain, a newer house on a less busy street with a blissful acre of land between us and the rest of civilization. A house that is near several wonderful yarn shops, the cat shelter where we found Rainy and where I volunteer, The Loop where I can cycle by The Ocean and breathe in that salt air. That was a huge step toward a best life!

 

Rainy, living her best life with her Teddy

In 2008, I did a lot of group-oriented things, like volunteer work at the animal shelter, a few animal transports, a ton of meetings, local campaigns in October. Last summer, Chris and I did the GYGIG fundraiser and I ran the Tour de France KAL with Meg. Life got out of balance very fast. I am an introverted person by nature, and doing so many extroverted things at once -- though I believe in the causes and love the work -- was killing me. I had little solitude during these months to daydream, read, knit, draw, or write in my journal or process any of what was going on, and I was miserable.

From this insight, I am going to make my list of goals for 2009. Along with the above-mentioned job and hallway painting, I plan to feed my soul and discover my best life by doing the following:

1. Read my one page a day devotional book and write in my journal every day. Or most days.

2. Continue reading the Artist's Way, and pursue the creative exercises recommended by the author: 1) to do Morning Pages (write three journal pages per day) and 2) to have an Artist's Date, a two-hour-a- week date that you keep for yourself to take a walk, visit a museum or yarn store, do your hobby/craft, listen to music, etc. 

3. Read more print books.  For last year's goal, I tried audiobooks, and discovered I do prefer print-book-in-the-hand.

4. Plan house and garden projects. In some ways, the house and garden are like giant art projects, deciding what colors to paint the rooms, or what plants to add and replace in the garden.

5. Continue genealogy research. Last year at this time, I began the journey of researching my family history. What an adventure! We discovered past relatives in semi-local cemeteries I didn't know were there. We found living relatives in Switzerland. The detective work helps me to understand a whole history and culture and family in a way I never have before, and is bringing a new richness to my life. 

6. Knit to the Next Level. Last year, my knitting goal was to knit sweaters. I did finish Caroline the felted jacket, and the Dream in Color Shrug. I started the TdF KAL sweater, Breton Girl, and also Fantine. I'll finish those this year, but instead of concentrating on a specific type of project, I want to increase my skills.

My best knitting life is to not be dependent on the pattern-as-written, but to make those modifications in size or style that others do for better fit or personal preference (three-quarter sleeves drive me crazy!). I had a little experience doing this with the picot camisole, but it wasn't intentional. I'd like to become more comfortable with substituting yarns and the wonky gauges that result. I've heard that Elizabeth Zimmerman is great for this, and I received her book Knitting without Tears for Christmas. This is more of an ongoing process than a a specific goal I can attain, but if by the end of the year, I can point to one or two projects where I felt confident changing the pattern with a minimum of LYS assistance, I'll consider it a success.

This is a partial list, but some of the most important components for me. What are you doing in 2009, whether it be something big, or something small, to pursue your best life?

Comments

[Robin]

Wow, Rainy has it made!

I like the idea of having an Artist's Date - the 2 hours to do a craft or write or something non-chore, non-work-related. I'm hoping to learn to knit or re-learn to crochet this year, and to read my magazines when they arrive instead of letting them pile up on the coffee table!

[Chris]

As I started to read your post, I thought of a recent post on Get Rich Slowly http://www.getrichslowly.org/blog/2008/12/28/whats-your-why-the-importance-of-finding-meaning-in-your-life/ . I'm very introverted and tend to sink into my little quiet world all too easily - I need to work on external connections much more this year, as well as on exercise and eating better.

Thanks for such a thoughtful post.

[pam]

You have some great resolutions -- and wrote a very thoughtful, thought provoking post. I don't, in general, make resolutions, at least not at New Year's. But I have been thinking of late about taking time to enjoy the real joys in my life. Thanks.

[Sydney]

One of my goals this year is to interact more with people. Sometimes I get lost in my own little world and forget that there's another world out there. Then other kinds of interactions just make me nervous so I avoid them. I find I have to balance my extroverted time with some introverted time. Too much of either one and I feel out of balance.

[sprite]

I agree that the balance between personal time and public time is hard to find, but absolutely crucial to staying sane.

And I particularly love your genealogy goal and would love it if you blogged about it a bit more. I think researching family is so interesting, but challenging at the same time -- and would make fascinating reading.

[Karen]

I think those are some really great goals. It's so easy for us to forget to put things that feed our soul into our goals for the new year.

[Dorothy W.]

Those goals sound great to me, especially since they come out of a recognition of who you are and what you need. I like your point about finding the dissonance and doing something about it. It's easy to start to feel hopeless and powerless about change, but there's really no need to feel that way. And your point about filling your soul makes so much sense too; I can certainly think about how to spend more time on the things that bring happiness.

[Karen]

You have some great goals for the new year. My biggest goal this year it to finally run a 5k.

[audioknits]

You've written a thought-provoking post. Last year was a whirlwind of activity for you, and it sounds like you learned a lot about yourself and what works to help you live that best life. I agree that balance is important, and I too get overwhelmed if I don't have enough time on my own.

That said, I do hope we have another blogger meet-up in the near future to help us achieve that balance!

[Beth]

Great goals! I really enjoyed reading your post about your thought process.

[Sheepish Annie]

Knitting Without Tears changed my knitting life! I realized that I can knit a sweater. And I can make it do whatever I want it to do (within reason...) It didn't seem possible or even logical, but when I took it one step at a time, it really was!

I suppose there is a life metaphor in there somewhere...

[Sandy in South Dakota]

Good Morning. It's like a miracle. I was in a book store the other day and was drawn to a particular book ...The Writing Diet by Julia Cameron....I read bit of it, bought it and left it on a table at home, thinking that it's another fad diet I will fail at. Yesterday after reading your blog, I began "seriously" reading it. My issue is overeating. The Morning Pages will be my salvation. I'm amazed to suddenly connect with someone else writing them, for their own personal reason. And, I will, no doubt, be a more confident knitter as well. And, I intend to adapt some of your other goals to my life. Thank you and God bless. Sandy

[sarah]

Best of luck with your studying and personal growth this year. I hope you'll have time to do some cycling too. It's really important to me as the exercise makes my body feel good and the time to think (or just zone out) sorts out my head =)

[Yvonne]

You have some really nice goals for 2009. I agree with you about audio books. I have decided to only listen to audio books of books that I have already read. So I will listen to classics like Pride & Prejudice while I am driving in the car.

[Robin]

I really like your list. My way of living my best life for this year is my goal of improving/making new living spaces in our house to enjoy. I've been looking at catalogs and getting ideas. Each room is a lot like a knitting project, you are right. I like that analogy.

[Emily Barton]

Sounds like you're going to have a wonderful, best year ever, 2009! Rainy looks adorable.