Knitting Hall of Shame

In my list of Knitterly Things You Didn't Know About Me, #4 says that the object I'm most ashamed of knitting is a purple shrug from Knit.1. I will post my confession forthwith:

I, of She Knits, confess that I wanted to be cool and knit something from the "edgy" magazine known as Knit.1. When the second issue came out, it had a coral colored shrug on the cover that looked fashionable, but, well, normal. As in, people are not going to point at me with one hand, and clutch their stomachs with the other, because they are doubled-over laughing so hard at me for appearing in suburbia in this sweater. The same cannot be said if I had chosen, for example, one of the pirate knits in the travel issue. That is a Sheepish Annie Grocery Store story waiting to happen. (Thank goodness I am in a different state). Anyway, the coral colored shrug seemed to be just what I was looking for.  It was now a matter of finding the right yarn for the pattern.

Sooooooo...I visited a number of yarn shops last fall trying to find a substitute yarn for the shrug. The pattern called for Lion Brand (they all do) Homespun, and as somewhat of a yarn snob, I wanted something of better quality, something that would wash well and last. Nothing I found was the right gauge, or the right color, and I was Getting Impatient (mistake #2). I, of She Knits, then did what I vowed I would not do, what I knew I shouldn't have done even as I was doing it...I bought the Lion Brand. I can only plead that I had succumbed to the fuzzy headedness of fall allergies.

I knit the back and sleeves in two weeks, a record for me. But I couldn't figure out the directions for the shaping of the fronts, and this pattern was labeled beginner. My good friend C had to translate it, with drawn diagrams, for me. But did the warning sirens go off in my head yet? No, of course not. (mistake #3) I knit the front pieces up, seamed the whole sweater, and then began the ribbed hem. It starts at one side seam and curves up the front and around the back of the neck, then down the other side to that seam. When picking up stitches around that curved front, there were big holes in the yarn (Hi Alice). I knit and unknit that picked-up row about 6 times, trying to get it to look right. And then I noticed that the sweater was Going Fuzzy. The cheap yarn was "unraveling" itself, making a purple haze all over my coat when I knit in the car. I decided to pretend it was mohair. It was too late to stop now.

At last I finished it and put it on. Despite careful gauge swatching, it is at least two sizes too big. It made me feel like Grimace to wear it: big, purple, and fuzzy. Without further stalling, I, She Knits, post evidence of my Knitting Shame (click to enlarge; I'm sorry it's so dark!):

Promise me you will run away if at any time in the future you see, or even contemplate, Homespun Yarn. Learn from my fuzzy purple mistake. I'm wondering if Knit.1, begging for reader photos of finished objects, really wants a copy of this. And now, would anyone be willing to cheer me up and post a photo of their own entry in the Knitting Hall of Shame?

Booking Through Thursday

1. Do you keep a list of books to read? Yes
2. Where do you keep your list (computer, PDA, paper, etc.)? My old list is from my organizer (paper). My new list is on Amazon.
3. How often do you refer to your list? Every time you go for a new book to read? When book shopping? Or? From time to time I update the list, removing titles that are no longer of interest, or adding new titles that I want to check out in the bookstore. I consult it before Christmas or my birthday, when people ask for ideas of books I'd like. It's more of a placeholder than anything else. When I'm ready to start a new book, I go to my shelves and pick something from there that I haven't read yet. I haven't coordinated the buying of new books with the reading of same right away. OK, I buy books faster than I can read them. :)

Comments

[tiennie]

The shrug's not so bad (ahem, cough). I don't have a knitterly hall of shame yet except to say that I know it will be coming! I'm a newbie after all. As for the books - I have a stack of books, lists of book on my computer (books to read and books I have read in the past 5-10 years or so), and also on KCLS.org - my local library system, I have a list of books on hold to read.

[Dana]

"I decided to pretend it was mohair. It was too late to stop now."

I love it- you are too funny. And yes ma'am, I will run from Homespun! Where's the picture of you wearing it? I don't keep a list of books I read, but that is a good idea. I actually have to pick up a book I ordered today- "Found" by Karen Kingsbury.

[Laura]

HEE! you are too funny! It doesn't look so bad in that photo (but then it's not on you). Do you have a larger "friend" that you could give it to as a gift?

Lionbrand is not so bad if used wisely. It's great for baby stuff that will be vomited on, thrown in the washer and dryer, and outgrown in 2 months. I'm not being silly--I really do believe this and use Lionbrand yarns in this way. Why spend major bucks on yarn for a baby?

[Sheepish Annie]

Lion Brand Homespun has been relegated to afghan status in The Sheep household. The cats seem to like it for napping.

I did a pretty cool ninja imitation for the store manager last night in the supermarket. (she had accidentally flung a can of mousse at me while bagging my groceries and I was demonstrating how to avoid flying objects...) That drew some looks. But the manager seemed to enjoy it. I could have a whole other blog just for grocery store posts!! :)

[Julie]

I too made the mistake of using Homespun for a sweater once. After all, it's soft and there are some pretty colors. I'll have to look, but I think I ditched that sweater; if not, I guess I could bear the shame and post a picture. I've had a few items that belong in the Knitting Hall of Shame, but I think I've gotten rid of them so I could pretend they never happened.

[sarah]

Those wool fumes are dangerous. What a shame Lion Brand isn't available here so I could spurn it! Alas, I haven't knit anything I'm ashamed of; I wonder if that means I have terrible taste?

[Nancy]

Grimace - tee-hee!

[Martha]

It LOOKS so pretty and inoffensive....it's easy to be fooled!!! I love the look of your blog, very cute!

[Meg]

Thanks for revealing your hall of shame shrug. I have a hall of shame moment that I am saving up for a big REVEAl someday, when I get round to ripping it and reusing the yarn. Luckily, at least the yarn is my very favourite yarn, so there is something left to salvage from my errors!
I agree with Laura, anyone you can gift Grimace to?

[Beth]

"I decided to pretend it was mohair." That's hysterical!

I used to knit prayer shawls from Lion Brand Homespun, but now it feels weird and kind of "squeaky" in my fingers. I'm still looking for a good substitute.

As for the Knitting Hall of Shame entry, I'm sure I have something around here that would qualify. :) I don't wear the scarves I made when I first started knitting and I think one of those may be the item to get me in. :) (I'll try to post one othis weekend.)

[Kendra]

I have so been there and done that with one of the "cool" patterns from the R2 magazines. A ribbon knit top. I'll hunt out a photo and share the pain too! I liked the Grimace comparision - very funny!

[Sydney]

It doesn't look too bad when it's reclining like that. ;) I know what you mean though. I made a simple shrug out of Homespun several years ago. I have no idea what made me do it. It fit okay but I just didn't work out. It's long gone.

[Sarah]

Oh, how sad that shrug didn't work out after all your effort! I've used some of the Lion wool-ease and thought it was fine when I was just learning knitting, but now I crave the pricey yarns ;-)

[hege]

Isn't it amazing that Vogue knitting collaborated with this Lion Brand advertising blitz? I was so surprised when I bought the magazine to find it was all Lion Brand yarn... Many of the designs are so cute, though. Sorry it didn't work out. I might direct you to this http://pineconelodge.blogspot.com/2006/02/finishing-ufo.html as an entry in my hall of shame. I didn't make too much of it at the time, but it didn't fit me when it was finished, the shape was unforgiving and only suitable for a long waisted sylph of a six-foot model, and it doesn't look so good unbuttoned. AND it only came in one size. So even though I enjoyed making it, I have never worn it :(

[Sharon]

Nothing made with purple wool of any kind could possibly be any good ;)

I think we have all had a knitting hall of shame but aren't brave enough to talk about it. Lion Brand is available from an Aussie on line store, remind me never to be tempted to use it!!